by Jefferson Holbrook, DSC.
I know what you’re thinking: “Hey, Rev. Dr. Jefferson B. Holbrook, isn’t this the same a Blaming?” I’m glad you asked me that. Actually, Blaming is a key ingredient in making next year your Worst Year Ever! But Judging Others is where it all begins. You cannot exactly blame someone for something until you find fault with them.
And, before you think this is going to be too difficult, let me assure you– Judging Others is super easy! There is ALWAYS something wrong with other people. Dig a little deeper into the function of judging other and you will find that judging other people and situations begins with finding fault with other people for their behavior and finding fault with any situation you are in. Your job is to “look on the dark side,” instead of looking on the bright side. For those pie in the sky obnoxious optimists, there is a silver lining for every cloud. For you, every silver lining has a cloud!
A great starting point is accepting the “Us Against Them” mentality. Samuel Richardson was right when he said, “It is much easier to find fault with others than to be faultless ourselves.” But that hair, though… Am I right? This old dude was rocking the white dreads before they were cool (they’re still not cool).
If you think that Finding Faults With Others sounds like being judgmental, then you are absolutely right! Judging other people is the logical next step immediately following finding fault with them. Life isn’t fair. And because life isn’t fair, your life isn’t going exactly the way you would like most of the time. Am I right? Well, the I’m here to tell you that this is not your fault. Perhaps the world in general or other nefarious nebulous forces in the universe are arrayed against you. Remember, it’s not Paranoia if they are really out to get you…
Okay, we’ve all heard the well-meaning saying “There is no reward for finding fault in others.” But I beg to differ. Or, demand to differ. Or, whatever.
The point is, that there are huge upsides to finding fault with others. I would like to highlight the first and most obvious benefit. When we are busy finding fault with other people, we have no time left to work on locating and working on our own faults. This also allows us to pretend that we, in fact, have no faults at all. That’s the beauty of these Top Ten Ways to Make Next Year Your Worst Year Ever! We are blessed to live in a society where we can all pretend to be faultless. That’s right. It’s not just for narcissists anymore!
Habeeb Akande must have been following my blog when he gave the helpful advice “Insecure people put others down to raise themselves up.” Is he actually saying the we should not be insecure and therefor not put other down? I don’t think so at all. I believe he is giving quality instruction to those of us who are insecure. According to him, all an insecure person needs to do to raise themselves up is to put others down. This is actually helpful advice. What is the best way to put someone down? Looking at them sideways when they walk into a room is a good start. This is also called “giving them the side eye,” and refers to being judgmental on the down-low. In fact, the side eye sometimes morphs into “Low-Key Judging” which is basically just regular judging except with the intention of not getting caught.
A well-worn verse from the New Testament of the King James Version of the Bible says “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” This is good advice. It’s actually good advice for two different types of people. First, the ones who don’t want to be judged know what they need to do…not be judgy. But there’s a second group who can benefit from this wisdom. The ones who don’t mind being judged have free rein to be as judgmental as they want. This is good news for those of us who like to be judgmental. Now we can blame others all we want, without the nuisance of a pesky conscience.
But the real question is “How do I judge others?” This is the most important question. Some people obviously are born to be judgmental…like Karen at the County Fair who gives Irma “the look” when Irma puts her pie down on the table. Karen’s thinking maybe Irma only used three eggs…look at the way the topping is sagging already. And it’s not even 80 degrees yet?! If Karen knows how to do anything, it’s how to be judgmental…and, of course, how to use the right number of eggs when baking her pie.
But what about those who are not born with the gene that gives one the super power of being judgmental. That’s where I come in. I’m here to help you help yourself with my Self-Help (Selfish-Helpless) wisdom. Apparently someone put forth that you have to know yourself first before judging others. This is helpful advice. We want to know our good points, of course, and this is where a little self-knowledge comes in. Why? So that we can look down on others and criticize them for not doing as good a job as us at those things we excel at.
And, yes, Santa Claus is one of the most judgmental bastards in the known universe. Who does he think he is? Telling kids that they’re not good enough to get the plastic crap that they long for so desperately. So, in addition to approximately 9,274,559,613 counts of Breaking and Entering, Santa Claus is surely going to hell for being so judgmental.
With this expert advice you should have no problem starting a habit of blaming others and being judgmental. Sure, there might be a small price to pay for this habit. It’s really small. Nothing to be too terribly worried about. Just a small thing that you probably won’t miss. By focusing on the mistakes of others, whether real or imagined you are most likely guaranteed a lifetime of unhappiness. That’s why you make it a habit! That way when you realize how mistaken you’ve been for all these years, the habit is too strong to break. But, on the plus side, in addition to making people feel unworthy and “less than,” you are well on your way to making next year your Worst Year Ever!
Jefferson Holbrook, DSC, received a Doctor of Science in Communications from Tudor College of Earlscroft University. He also holds a Bachelor of Arts in English and a Bachelor of Arts in History from Kennesaw State University as well as a Master of Arts in Organizational Management from the University of Phoenix. He has published numerous essays, articles, poems, short stories and blogs. He is also the author of two collections of poetry. He lives with his family in the southeastern United States.
My First Blog: http://jbhpoetry.blogspot.com/
© Copyright 2018 Jefferson Brian Holbrook and Kingdom of the Son. All rights reserved.